Saturday, 11 August 2012


   Doc Barbara applauds with both hands the idea of maintaining the spirit of the Games once they are over. She therefore decided to choose one activity with which to inspire others but (being of a solitary, retiring and frugal nature) she deemed equestrian, sailing and other team sports inappropriate.

 After practising gymnastics on a sandy beach with ball and hoop, clad in a minimal leotard and drawing gasps and comments from the assembled crowd, she felt humbled by their response but also wary of causing competition to the young girl from nearby Pontypool whose talents she did not wish to challenge. She therefore decided on swimming and firstly mounted a cliff in her half-price bargain shortie wet-suit to find a suitable diving spot:

before essaying to cartwheel into the sea along the shingle; "There's more than one way to skin a sausage roll," she called enigmatically over her shoulder as she hit the briny.

   Note from the Editor of "The Pontypool Pontificator": our gymnast is, of course, quaking in her spray-on pumps but does this photo of Doc Barbara's empty trainers mean that the dear old dab has finally met her Water-loo? or merely popped off to the latter?

   (PS from reporter: "We have removed the photo of the trainers as it was causing alarm and grief.)

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